How Edmonton Keeps Crime Statistics Down!

How Edmonton Keeps Crime Statistics Down!

I don’t know about other major urban centers, but Edmonton has it figured out! Here’s how to keep crime down. Or at least crime statistics…

Set up two citizen call-in numbers. One is for emergencies, the other is to report a crime.

Crime Statistics - EdmontonWhen the caller reaches line #2, have an answering machine direct him (or her, but we shall use the generic him; please, no flack), direct him to indicate which crime type his experience falls under. If it falls under more than one, as in personal, vehicle damage under $5000, or property theft from vehicle, he may become frustrated or confused, hang up and not call back. Stats down one point. YAY!

Crime stats - edmonton

If caller persists, direct him to an online report form. If caller does not have access to internet, Stats down one point. YAY!

crime Statistics - Edmonton

If caller does have internet, and is sufficiently incensed by the crime committed against him to still want to file a report, direct him to the online report form.


Allow caller to answer 7, 496 questions, some of which will require caller to pause while he calls to get an estimate on repairs (as in replacing the 2 smashed out side windows of our son’s truck), or looks up the value of the property stolen (as in the replacement cost of our neighbour’s barbecue). By the time caller reaches the end of the report form, tell him the session has timed out. Please begin again. (Neither our son nor our neighbour followed through.)  Stats down two points. YAY!


As of today, Edmonton’s June statistics do not reflect the mini crime spree that occurred in our back alley last night. However, our tenacious neighbour, the one now missing a barbecue, is tracking down the fella a few house away who has a security camera. Maybe he caught someone on video!



photo credit: Neil. Moralee <a href=”″>Hold onto your hat.</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a> <a href=””>(license)</a>  photo credit: Darren Johnson / iDJ Photography <a href=”″>The Call</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a> <a href=””>(license)</a> photo credit: Simon Blackley <a href=”″>I’m listening</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a> <a href=””>(license)</a> photo credit: homethods <a href=”″>MacBook Air Entrepreneur Blogger Business  – Credit to</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a> <a href=””>(license)</a> photo credit: Jonno Witts <a href=”″>Writers Block (8)</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a> <a href=””>(license)</a>
When the Bough Breaks

Don't miss a post!

Want the next post delivered right to your inbox? Just enter your email in the field below!

  • Patricia Anne Elford

    Well-presented, Bobbi. Could feel the rising ire burning through the net! Perhaps a letter to the Editor in similar vein?

    Nothing so helpful as stats which don’t reflect the true situation.

    These same deterrents are in operation in so many lesser situations. It makes one suspicious that the means of communication that are supposed to be such improvements are, in reality, mazes intended to have just such an effect on the person looking for assistance or wishing to voice dissatisfaction of any sort. Nahhh. That couldn’t be it!

    • Bobbi

      Patricia, how cynical! That could never be it!